There is so much pain inside of me today, so much hurt. No one really knows the depths of despair in which I sink sometimes. I'm crying today because you're the only person that ever considered my feelings, you the only one that purposely tried not to hurt me. I miss you so much. I saw the father of one of the guys that was around the night you were killed. And it hurt, it hurt because he still has his son, he can still talk to his, he can hug his son, and all I have left is the memories. I don't hate that man, and I don't begrudge him is son, I just wish everyone involved that night had made different choices. That's the 2nd time I've seen him this year, and I know it's not suppose to hurt me but it does. I've been fighting my tears all day, so now I'm sitting here just letting them roll. There are other things being done around me, towards me, and I know if you were still here you wouldn't allow it. I miss "my superman", my knight in shining armor. I miss my Stevie.